NowTHINK!AboutIt

Avoiding Hackneyed...Making Sense

HOPE: Now or Later or Both

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Hope: wish, dream, what

What Does Hope
Really Mean?

One problem with reading the Bible is the fact that there is a large span of time between the moment it was written and time you read it.

Even the newest parts of the Bible are still a couple thousand years old. It was written at a different place, in a different culture and at a different time, so we shouldn’t be surprised when the words change a bit.

Don’t misunderstand. I’m not questioning inspiration or suggesting the words are unreliable. All I’m saying is that words do take on varying shades of meaning over time. They don’t change entirely, but enough to need qualifying. Without qualification, you get the wrong message.

Not to worry. We know the ancient languages and the meanings of the words as they were used in the past. We also understand these words as they were used over time. We’re not in the dark, but to understand the difference we need to study the process. We call that study etymology. It’s a science.

The word Hope is a good example. [Read more…]

16 Life Lessons From The Yes-No Dichotomy

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Don't hide or show your anger. Admit it and explain it.

The Beauty
Of Yes

In this post I want to focus on decision making or what we might call the dichotomy of yes and no. Like 1’s and 0’s in computer language, life is a combination of these two words.

When tested for diseases, we long to hear, “No, found nothing! All is clear!” But a No in that situation is really a Yes to life. It’s a new lease and we love to hear it.

In spite of No being the best response in some situations, we still like hearing Yes more.

When asking for help or a personal day or permission from parents, “Yes!” sounds like a million dollars. It’s like winning a mini lottery.

But we aren’t always subject to the judgments of others or unpredictable circumstances. Sometimes, in fact very often, we sit in the Yes/No driver’s seat. Every decision we make involves a yes or a no answer. Sometimes it’s a little of both.

Even Indecision eventually becomes No.

The point is, Yes and No are unavoidable. There’s no bench warming in life. Yes and No make us a part of the game and Jesus had something to say about this dichotomy.

You have heard that it was said by them of old time, you shall not forswear yourself, but shall perform unto the Lord your oaths. But I say unto you, swear not at all. Neither by heaven, for it is God’s throne, nor by the earth, for it is his footstool. Neither by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. Neither shall you swear by your head, because you cannot make one hair white or black. But let your communication be, yea yea or nay nay, for whatsoever is more than these comes of evil. Matthew 5:33-37

First let me address the problematic words. There are two: forswear and swear. They are opposites. A dichotomy of sorts.

Swearing is the strongest kind of promise you can make. If you swear to something, you have, in a sense, guaranteed it.

Forswearing, on the other hand, is what we call it when a person fails to follow through. They swear to do something and then fail to keep the promise. Or they swear something is true only to be found lying later. [Read more…]

9 Thoughts On Love

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Secure people don't rise above, they stay above.

Relax
You’re Not Jesus

The Bible says much about loving people:

Love your enemies (Matthew 5:44), Love your neighbor (Mark 12:31) and there’s no end to the number of times we’re told to Love one another (John 13:34; 15:12, 17; Romans 13:8; 1 Thessalonians 4:9; 1 Peter 1:22, 3:8; 1 John 3:11, 23, 4:7, 11-12 and more).

The thread is so prominent in the New Testament you can’t miss it.

And it is so prevailing that we usually extrapolate the meaning to,

Christians are to love everybody!

That’s a mouthful! In fact, it’s a little too much.

I wouldn’t say the idea is entirely wrong but it might be overstating the point. There is a big gap between loving the people we know and loving all the ones we don’t know.

But forget the magnitude of everydoby. We don’t do a very good job of loving the few with whom we make contact.

We spend an inordinate amount of time distrusting, not believing and not liking the people with whom we have proximity: the ones next door, down the street, in the next work cubicle, in the cars on the road and on the TV screen.

And those are just the people we see. If we struggle with those few, how could we ever love everybody, the whole world.

To clear the air and reiterate the reality: [Read more…]

New Review For In Defense of Divorce

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In Defense of Divorce: Why A Marriage Should Never Be Saved At The Expense of a Life

This Week
In Divorce

In Defense Of Divorce just got a new review. This one by the inimitable Bruce Hunter.

No one says it quite like Bruce and that’s not surprising. He holds a honors in English Lit, which means he’s spent a lot of time in the words of others. With all his exposure to what’s been said and how, he’s developed an interesting style of his own.

You may not be interested in the book but the review is worth a read.

You can find his review here.

Elsewhere

Fiona Reddan of the Irish Times reported that Ireland, which has one of the lowest divorce rates worldwide, has seen an increase in divorce among those over 60. One very interesting theory for the phenomenon, suggested by family law solicitor Marion Campbell, is retirement.

When the breadwinner retires, problems can start arising when the husband is suddenly at home all the time and the cracks become fissures.

It’s common knowledge that retirement brings it’s own difficulties so it isn’t unreasonable to say soft spots in the relationship are magnified under the added pressure. Add to that the fact that Irish law no longer sees marriage as hardened-in-cement and you can understand why traditional ideas are crumbling.

The elephant in the article was religion. It wasn’t mentioned but the dam of religious control in Ireland is obviously breaking against the tide of disenchantment.

Also. [Read more…]

The Most Important Factor In Fatherhood

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Mothers hold kids close. Dads tether.

Be There

Fathers.Com lists several statistical observations about children living in fatherless homes:

Fatherless children are more likely to live in poverty, at greater risk for alcohol and drug abuse, more than twice as likely to commit suicide, experience more trouble academically, are more inclined to exhibit delinquent behavior and tend to engage sexually at a younger age.

All of the statistics are well documented. The conclusion is that Fathers do make a difference. The question is, Why? What is making the difference?

There are many possible answers to that question but one observation that is often overlooked is the fact that maybe a father makes an impact by just being present. Most books describe fathering somewhat like an Attorney General. He makes the right rules, maintains the right discipline and models the highest standards of virtue always.

Rules, discipline and virtue are important but the stats quoted are based on homes with fathers vs homes without. Just being there is a big deal.

Although there is a lot of discussion and speculation about what good fathers do, beyond being present, it might be difficult to isolate exactly what that is.

Fathers, like any other humans are individuals, meaning they’re diverse and have different ways of relating to family members. There mannerisms are partly learned from previous generations and I doubt any two are exactly alike, even among those considered the best.

Let’s face it. Not all fathers are equally secure, confident and motivated. They may or may not be educated. Some are entrepreneurs and some work-a-days but if they are present, they have an impact.

Even the fathers classed as good probably don’t know exactly what they do to make a difference but there are likely many reasons why being present is better than being absent.

A few observations are in order. [Read more…]